


By Your Side

by CaptainCoffee



Category: Star Trek Voyager
Genre: Extended/missing scenes, F/M, breakups and makeups, eventual happy ending (?), navigating relationship, some fluff some angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:07:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25637794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainCoffee/pseuds/CaptainCoffee
Summary: “You once told me that a relationship was a luxury you couldn’t allow yourself as Captain”, Chakotay  said gently.Kathryn sighed. “When I told you that, we had been in the Delta Quadrant for four months. Now it’s been over two years. And, though it’s something I’d never voice to the crew, we do have to face the possibility that we may never return home. And we also have to face the possibility that any... relationships we once had there may be... non-existent now. I’m far from giving up hope, but after all we’ve been through, I’ve found it necessary to do some reevaluating...”
Relationships: Chakotay/Kathryn Janeway
Comments: 29
Kudos: 53





	1. Feelings Once Spoken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You once told me that a relationship was a luxury you couldn’t allow yourself as Captain”, Chakotay said gently.
> 
> Kathryn sighed. “When I told you that, we had been in the Delta Quadrant for four months. Now it’s been over two years. And, though it’s something I’d never voice to the crew, we do have to face the possibility that we may never return home. And we also have to face the possibility that any... relationships we once had there may be... non-existent now. I’m far from giving up hope, but after all we’ve been through, I’ve found it necessary to do some reevaluating...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My very first fic on my new AO3 account! Yay! 
> 
> I like to believe that Captain Janeway and Chakotay had a ‘thing’, so I decided to write this to chronicle their relationship though the series, post ‘Resolutions’.  
> I really challenged myself with this fic, to write it in such a way that stuck to/worked with canon.  
> Hopefully you can look at these chapters almost as ‘missing scenes’ that we never got from the show.  
> It’s still a work in progress, but I hope to update around every 2 weeks or sooner.  
> Enjoy!

(Timeline: A few weeks after ‘Sacred Ground’)

* * *

They hadn’t once mentioned ‘New Earth’ since they had returned.

It was as if they had been two completely different people on that planet, and, when back on the ship, those people had to disappear- retreat behind the stoic facades of Captain and First Officer.

Of course, it wasn’t as if they had had much time to speak privately anyway.

  
Immediately following their return, they had been thrust into conflict with Seska and the Kazon once again, resulting in the entire crew being marooned on a hostile planet.  
Not exactly the place to discuss one’s romantic sentiments.

But even then, though their relationship was tense with feelings unspoken, Kathryn didn’t want Chakotay to leave her side. And he wouldn’t have left it for anything.

Through this incident, and the next, and the next, they were supportive, caring to one another, but always stopping short at the wall that divided protocol from personal.

But every facade falls apart eventually, walls must come down, and feelings must be faced.

It was just after the Captain had gone through the arduous alien ritual needed to save Kes’ life. While she was gone, Chakotay had realized anew just how much he cared for her, and worried for her safety.

And Kathryn had seen his concern; too much concern for just First Officer to Captain.

So, one evening, after duty shifts were ended, Kathryn Janeway made the first move. She almost turned back twice before finally arriving at Chakotay’s quarters.  
Standing before the door, she caught herself looking surreptitiously behind her.

 _‘This is ridiculous’_ she thought.

Shaking off her nerves, she squared her shoulders, took a deep breath, and pressed the buzzer.

Hearing a ‘come in’, she took another breath and stepped inside.

Chakotay, understandably surprised to see her, quickly stood up from the reports he had been reviewing.

“At ease Commander” Kathryn said softly, with a wave of her hand. “I realize it’s late.”

“Well, I wasn’t exactly expecting visitors at this hour”, Chakotay remarked with a small smile.  
“Is there a problem?”

“No. Everything’s fine with the ship.”

Chakotay had known the moment Kathryn came in that something was troubling her, but he knew it wasn’t wise to push her. She would tell him when she was ready.

“Coffee?” He asked instead.

“Always”, Kathryn answered with a smile.

Chakotay knew her so well.

He quickly replicated two cups and handed one to her.

Taking a sip, a peculiar expression crossed her face.

“I... think I’ve got yours.”

Chakotay tasted the cup he held.

“Yes, you do.”

“Ugh. How many sugars do you put in there?”

“Only two. I don’t know how you manage it black.” 

“It’s an acquired taste.”

They stopped short in their teasing, realizing this was the first time they had laughed together since...

Exchanging the cups, their fingers brushed and a palpable electricity passed between them.

Kathryn sighed. “Chakotay we’ve got to talk.”

“About?” Chakotay asked, though he was almost sure he knew.

Before continuing, Kathryn slowly, deliberately removed her comm badge, placing it on Chakotay’s desk. She motioned to him to do the same.

Now there would be no interruptions.

“You know as well as I do. About... us. We can’t go on like this. I don’t pretend to think we can ignore what happened between us. But to the best of our knowledge, that planet was going to be our home for the rest of our lives. What we did was a perfectly natural response to that situation. Here, things are very different. We can’t have that same kind of relationship, and I know you understand that. We have duties to perform, a crew to set an example for, and... I still have a fiancé back home.”

She paused for a moment, then continued, more softly.

“But I want you to know... in spite of all of that, I do have real feelings for you Chakotay. And... I would like us to have something between us, here, now.”

Words failed her then.

She simply looked into Chakotay’s soft, dark eyes and awaited his response. He was silent so long that she began to wonder if it had been wise to say so much.

Chakotay, for his part, was simply too stunned to speak. He had never once expected this from her. He had been in love with her almost from the moment they met, but had been willing to accept it as a one sided sentiment. Their time on the planet, and what they had shared there, had given him hope, but the way things stood when they returned, he had been preparing himself to bury those feelings once again.

But now here she was, confessing to him that she shared his feelings.

As much as he would have liked to gather her in his arms that very moment, tell her everything he felt for her, he knew she had been under a lot of strain lately. He didn’t want to take advantage of that. He wanted her to be sure.

“You once told me that a relationship was a luxury you couldn’t allow yourself as Captain”, he finally said, gently.

Kathryn sighed. “When I told you that, we had been in the Delta Quadrant for four months. Now it’s been over two years. And, though it’s something I’d never voice to the crew, we do have to face the possibility that we may never return home. And we also have to face the possibility that any... relationships we once had there may be... non-existent now. I’m far from giving up hope, but after all we’ve been through, I’ve found it necessary to do some reevaluating.”

Her voice dropped to a whisper.

“And that’s really all I came to say.”

She cast her eyes downward, feeling suddenly very tired. Then, she felt Chakotay’s hand softly caress her cheek. She raised her eyes to meet his once again.

“Kathryn...” he said her name hesitantly, having called her nothing but Captain since returning from the planet, and watched for her reaction.

  
She was smiling, tears brimming in her eyes.

She had forgotten how much she loved hearing him say her name.

“Kathryn “, he began again, “Everything you’ve said, I’ve wanted to hear you say for a long time. And you know... that I love you. But are you sure?”

She kissed the hand that was touching her face, and whispered “Very sure.”

They looked into each other’s eyes, not as Captain and First Officer, but as two people in love, who will treasure every moment together, for as long as they can.

Chakotay did gather her in his arms now, and for the rest of that night, all was as it had been on that beautiful planet, with only the two of them in the world.


	2. Broken Trusts

(Timeline: Just after ‘Scorpion’)

* * *

Kathryn Janeway played the moments over and over again in her mind.  
They had been careless, and she knew it.

When they had gone back in time to 1990’s Earth.  
She could have been reasonable and left her First Officer on the bridge.  
That’s what most Captains would have done.  
But no, she kept him with her on the away mission, and left Harry with the bridge.  
Harry! A fine officer, but still, an Ensign!

And bringing Tom and Tuvok along then too.  
They probably knew.  
Tuvok could read her like a book, and Tom- Hell, Tom was probably already running bets on them.  
In retrospect, she just hoped they had been occupied enough not to notice.  
But how could she have been so thoughtless?

There had been other times.  
The luau!  
They had come together, and they had left together.  
What must everyone have thought then?

And then there was that shuttle trip.  
A routine mission _really_ needed both the Captain and First Officer?  
How obvious could you be?  
At least no one knew what they had _done_ in that shuttle, but if they did, Tom would have been set for life with replicator rations.

And then soon after, when she had ‘cheated death’, and invited Chakotay on that moonlight sail to celebrate.  
She had extended the invitation right in her ready room!  
They could have been monitored by anyone.

And to add to it, that moonlight sail had turned into a moonlight swim, which had turned into the holodeck being in use for the entire night,  
resulting in the Captain and First Officer having to sneak out separately in the morning like guilty teenagers.

 _‘That’s just what we’re acting like’,_ she thought, _‘Teenagers, who can’t control themselves. We know better.’_

And then, only a few days prior, when- again in her ready room- she had told Chakotay how she couldn’t imagine a day without him.

They had been mere moments from a kiss when Tuvok interrupted them.

 _‘Maybe it was a good thing he did’_ Kathryn mused.

They had gotten carried away, and they had become distracted by their feelings. She could see that now.

Maybe that was why their conflict over the Borg truce had hurt so deeply.

Because it wasn’t just a disagreement between a Captain and First Officer anymore.

If it had been only that, things might have been different.

But now it was a matter of broken trusts, not only between Starfleet Officers, but between lovers.

And Kathryn knew that was dangerous.

Deep in thought, she was startled by the sound of her door buzzer.

She murmured a ‘come in’, and Chakotay stepped inside.

Kathryn managed a smile.

Chakotay smiled back, then wrapped her in a warm embrace.

For a brief moment, she rested her head on his chest, then slowly, decidedly pulled away.

Their gaze met, and Chakotay sighed.

“I knew there was something wrong. What is it?”

“I won’t beat around the bush”, Kathryn began, speaking rather harshly to keep her voice from trembling.  
“I think it would be wise... if we took a step back.”

Chakotay was silent for a moment, absorbing her words.

“Is this because of our disagreement over the Borg?” He finally asked.

“No...Yes. That’s part of it I guess. There’s a certain... trust that I’m afraid we’ve lost.”

“ I can’t tell you how sorry I am that I chose to disobey your orders, Kathryn-“ Chakotay began.

“Oh I know, Chakotay,” she interrupted with a wave of her hand.  
“We’ve been all through that. I can’t condone the decision you made, but I do understand. However, things have got to change between us.” She paused.  
“Because ... it’s not only you who’s broken a trust here.”

Chakotay sighed once again.

“I think I understand”, he said softly.  
”Mark?”

“Yes”, Kathryn whispered.

“I thought you had decided that he wasn’t really a part of your life anymore.”

“I thought I had too. But he’ll always be there, in the back of my mind. I guess what happened between us reminded me of just how important trust is between people. Even people as far away as Mark. Not to mention the example we’re setting for the crew with how we’ve been behaving.  
We can’t build any kind of relationship like this.”

“Then... you wouldn’t consider what we had to be a relationship”, Chakotay said softly.  
It wasn’t a question.

“I think what we had was a case of two very lonely people, who got carried away”, Kathryn said sadly, her voice almost a whisper.  
“So no. I can’t consider that a relationship. I’m sorry Chakotay.”

“I see”, Chakotay said simply, but with a pain in his expression that Kathryn couldn’t ignore. She had to look away.

She felt him place a soft touch on her shoulder, but still couldn’t meet his eyes.

“I can’t say I like the idea of separating, but I do understand your reasons”, Chakotay said with a sigh.  
“I suppose you always know best... Captain.”

He had said it kindly, but that ‘Captain’ had hit her like a slap in the face.  
She had grown so used to ‘Kathryn’.

“I suppose. Dismissed... Commander”, she murmured in response, almost succeeding in keeping her voice from breaking, but not quite.

Still looking away, she felt his hand drop from her shoulder, and heard the familiar sound of her door opening and closing behind him.

It had never sounded so final before.

Captain Janeway allowed herself the luxury of a good cry that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter was sad, but don’t worry, it’s going to get better!
> 
> And in case you’re wondering, here is an episode guide to the incidents mentioned:
> 
> 1990s Earth: ‘Future’s End  
> The luau: ‘Alter Ego’  
> That shuttle trip, and the moonlight sail: ‘Coda’


	3. Adjusted Relationships

(Timeline: Directly following the final scene of ‘Hunters’)

* * *

The Voyager crew were gathered in the mess hall, talking and laughing together, everyone thoroughly enjoying Neelix’s latest party.

Well, almost everyone.

Kathryn Janeway sat quietly at an isolated corner table.

She had arrived with Chakotay, but had slipped away when Neelix momentarily diverted Chakotay’s attention.

She needed some time to think over the events of that day.

A ‘Dear Jane’ letter.  
Kathryn had grown to expect some strange things out in the Delta Quadrant, but she had never expected that.

But what was even more unexpected was the way she felt about it.

She knew she should feel hurt, angry, or even betrayed, but she didn’t.

Yes, it had stung a bit, but what she felt more than anything was...relieved.

And as her eyes wandered over to where Chakotay stood, off by himself as well, she knew why.

Still gazing at him, she leaned her chin on her hand, reflecting on their earlier conversation, just before they had come to the party.

That was when she had admitted, to herself and to Chakotay, that she had been using Mark as a ‘safety net’.

She remembered Chakotay’s response: ‘You don’t have that safety net anymore.’

Well, she didn’t.  
She knew that breaking things off with Chakotay had been the right decision at the time, but now... things had changed so much.

Mark was no longer a factor.  
Chakotay had more than earned back her trust since their separation.  
And Kathryn was beginning to wonder if, maybe, there might be a chance for them to try again, to try to forge a real relationship together.

Chakotay turned around suddenly, and met Kathryn’s gaze.

He smiled, and she offered a small wave in response.

“So, there you are”, Chakotay teased, after making his way over to her.  
“For a moment, I thought the Captain had abandoned ship without telling the rest of us.”

Kathryn laughed gently.

“I’m sorry. I just had to be alone for a little while. I guess I’m not exactly in a party mood.”

“I understand.”

“I think I’ll go make my excuses to Neelix”, Kathryn said, rising.

She did so, and, turning to leave, found Chakotay waiting for her at the door.

“I’m not really in a party mood myself, to tell the truth. Would you mind if I walked you to your cabin?”

“Not at all Commander. Thank you.”

They spoke casually, but there was a tension in the air that was impossible for either to ignore.

They were silent all the way back to Kathryn’s quarters.

Arriving at her door, Chakotay had just said goodnight and begun to walk away, when Kathryn stopped him with a light touch on his arm.

“I’d like you to come in for a moment, if you don’t mind,” she said softly.

“Certainly.”

Once inside, however, they both remained silent, neither seeming to know quite what to say.

“Well”, Kathryn finally began, with a slightly nervous chuckle.  
“It’s been quite a day, hasn’t it.”

“Yes, it has,” Chakotay returned, automatically.

Kathryn began again.

“I’ve been giving some thought to what you said earlier, and...” she trailed off.

“Oh?” Chakotay encouraged her, trying to speak nonchalantly, but not quite succeeding.

“Yes. You were right, you know. I don’t have Mark as a safety net now. But... I don’t want to rush into anything. If...we do decide to... pursue a relationship, I don’t want what happened before to happen again.  
I want it to last.”  
She paused.  
“I think... I just need some time.”

Chakotay tenderly placed his hands on Kathryn’s shoulders, and looked deep into her clear, blue eyes.

“I meant what I said earlier”, he said softly.  
“If there’s one thing we have plenty of, it’s time. And I’m willing to wait. For whenever you think it’s right.”

Kathryn gave him a teary eyed smile.

“Good night, Captain.”

Chakotay turned to leave, but just before he did, Kathryn impulsively wrapped her arms around him in a long, grateful hug.  
After a moment’s surprise, Chakotay returned her embrace, holding her tightly.

“Thank you Chakotay”, she whispered.

“For what?” He murmured into her hair.

“For always being there for me.”


	4. Dinners and Decisions

(Timeline: Surrounding the events of ‘Timeless’.)

* * *

They took their time.

Over the next several months, their relationship deepened in a way it never had before.

They became each other’s most trusted confidant, reliable advisor, and closest friend.

They even slipped unconsciously back to a first name basis from time to time.

But they moved slowly, carefully, waiting to see when-and if- they should take the next step.

Until, one night, Kathryn decided they had waited long enough.

It was the night before they were to try their experimental slipstream drive.

If all went well, they would be home the next day, and that would be their last night in the Delta Quadrant.

She invited him to her quarters for dinner, and when she spoke of taking risks, they both knew she didn’t only mean the slipstream flight.

They spent that night together, their first in what had felt like a lifetime.

* * *

The next morning, after the flight-which hadn’t turned out quite as planned, but had still brought them ten years closer to home-  
Chakotay came into Kathryn’s ready room, bringing reports for her to review.

He was careful not to mention the previous evening, instead waiting to see if she would, but she reviewed the reports in a businesslike manner, and gave no indication that anything was out of the ordinary.  
Until he started to leave.

“Chakotay,” she murmured, stopping him.

She inclined her head toward her couch, inviting him to sit.

She discreetly pressed the locking mechanism on her ready room door before joining him.

They sat a few feet apart, rather awkwardly, neither seeming sure who would speak first.

“About last night...” Kathryn began, fiddling slightly with her fingers.

“I understand things didn’t work out as planned ,” Chakotay broke in.  
“And if you want to reconsider our relationship again, I won’t say a thing about it.”

Kathryn shook her head, smiling.

“No, Chakotay, I don’t want that at all. We took the risk, and I meant what I said. It may not have been our ‘last night in the Delta Quadrant’, but I don’t want that to change what’s happening between us. I’m willing to continue our relationship, if you are.”

Chakotay took her hand.

“Kathryn. Of course I’m willing.”

“But...” she continued, giving his hand a quick squeeze before standing.  
“There are going to have to be a few ground rules. I don’t want to repeat any of our past indiscretions. No pairing up for away missions. No first names on duty. No visits to the holodeck together. We retain separate quarters...”

She paced back and forth, ticking off the ‘rules’ on her fingers, as Chakotay watched, a hint of amusement in his eyes.

“And, we limit our... shall we say ‘dinners’ to once a week”, she finished.

“Once a week? I guess I can manage that”, Chakotay said with a teasing smile.

He stood to face Kathryn now, and his mood sobered slightly.

“But do you think all the secrecy is really necessary? After all, this crew has become much more like a family than simply a group of officers. Besides, we’re not in violation of any Starfleet protocols... at least that I know of.”

Kathryn chuckled.

“No, not directly. I went over those protocols with a fine tooth comb a long time ago. There is Regulation 1138, regarding ‘fraternization’, but it’s not exactly the Prime Directive, and God knows I’ve even bent that on occasion. It’s always been one regulation interpreted very loosely. There have been instances where Starfleet captains have had relationships with officers under their command, with no serious repercussions. Besides that, we have the extenuating circumstance of you having been Captain of your own ship, so really, we’re on even ground. And about the crew, I think of them in the same way you do, but I do think we should be cautious in how much we choose to reveal to them. There’s already enough gossip flying around without starting more. I happen to know some of them are even betting on us. Maybe we can tell them in time...but I don’t think it would be wise just yet.”

“Whatever you say Kathryn”, Chakotay answered, stepping closer to her.  
“I’m just glad you’ve decided to give us another chance.”

“So am I”, she whispered.

Chakotay’s arms encircled her now, and their lips met, memories of the previous night still dancing in their heads.

When their kiss started becoming a bit too heated, Kathryn broke the embrace, holding Chakotay gently at arms length.

“Next week, Commander”, she smirked.

Chakotay sighed slightly, but his cheeks dimpled into a smile.

“Next week”, he repeated.

“Now, it’s time we got back to the bridge. I have it on good authority that any crew member to catch the Captain and First Officer in the ready room for longer than 10 minutes wins three rations in Tom’s betting pool.”


	5. Entre’Acte

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little ‘in between’ segment that I wanted to add, because I wanted to make reference to some events that I didn’t feel needed entire chapters...

(Timeline: covering events from mid season 5- early season 6)

* * *

The romance flourished in the following months, and both Kathryn and Chakotay were happier than they could ever remember being.

Not to say that it was easy.

They still had their fair share of disagreements- the encounter with the ‘Equinox’ had been especially taxing- but they never let those drive a wedge between them, as they had once before.

Over time, they found that their personal relationship actually helped their professional one.

Having such an intimate knowledge of each other made it nearly impossible for one to lose trust in the other, which helped greatly in such instances as when Seven believed there was a conspiracy on Voyager.

* * *

They had an ongoing challenge to stick to their ‘rules’, but managed to do so- mostly. 

There _was_ that time they stuck Harry with the night shift for _four nights in a row_ , breaking their ‘once a week’ ordinance, but if Harry had found it suspicious that both Captain and First Officer were absent from the Bridge at the same time, he had certainly never said anything, and for the most part they were very discreet around the crew.

Strangely enough, the gossip surrounding them actually seemed to die down-or perhaps the crew were just more discreet as well.

* * *

And of course, it was always difficult for one to see the other heading off on what might be their last mission, but they knew that was simply the nature of their profession, and both agreed they shouldn’t keep this from treasuring every moment that they did have.

* * *

Through it all, they stood by each other’s side, ready to meet whatever future challenges might come their way...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episode index:  
> The Equinox incident: ‘Equinox Pt 1 and 2’  
> Seven’s conspiracy theory: ‘The Voyager Conspiracy’  
> The four nights in a row that Harry had the night shift for no specific reason (but we all know the reason): ‘Warhead’


	6. A ‘Fair’ Apology

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally wrote this as a one shot, but I felt it belonged here as well.  
> In my opinion, ‘Fair Haven’ was just SO wrong- everyone seemed really out of character to me- so I fixed it.  
> Remember that ion cloud they passed through at the beginning of the episode?  
> Read on...

(Timeline: An epilogue to ‘Fair Haven’)

* * *

“You’re the last one, Captain” said the Doctor, pressing a hypospray to her collar.

The Captain sighed and rubbed her neck.

“What exactly happened to us Doctor?”

“It seems that ‘cloud’ we passed through caused more issues than we thought. The ions appear to have had a deleterious effect on the neurons in your brains, wreaking havoc with your personalities- making you act... out of character, so to speak.”

“That explains why I haven’t exactly been feeling like myself lately.”

“Yes Captain. And it seems that spending large amounts of time on the holodeck exacerbated the problem. Even my program was affected. When I noticed the irregularities in my personality subroutines I was able to correct them, and thankfully I managed to formulate this inoculation to repair the damage in the rest of the crew.”

The Doctor paused for a moment now, looking a bit uncomfortable.

“Something else, Doctor?”

“Yes. You see, while my program was being affected, I made some rather... inappropriate inquiries into your personal life, that I never would have made otherwise. I’m truly sorry.”

Captain Janeway smiled reassuringly.

“I understand. I exhibited some embarrassing behavior myself at the time. Now... it all just feels like a bad dream. I’m glad you found the cause.”

The Doctor beamed in satisfaction.

“All in a day’s work. You’re free to go Captain.”

Passing Tom Paris on her way out of sickbay, the Captain waited for him to receive his injection, then discreetly pulled him aside.

“Tom. Did the Doctor fill you in on what happened?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“I think it would be in the best interest of the crew if you were to deactivate ‘Fair Haven’, at least for the time being. I know it wasn’t the cause of the problem, but it might bring up some... uncomfortable memories, if you get my meaning. “

“Understood. I guess I’ll stick to Captain Proton for a while”, Tom grinned.

Captain Janeway nodded in agreement, grinning back.

Exiting sickbay, her mood sobered.

She had one more crew member to speak to.

Making her way to Chakotay’s quarters, she tried to plan out exactly how she was going to apologize to him.

Since they had embarked on their confirmed relationship, they had never once been unfaithful to each other, and Kathryn had not intended to be this time.

Yes, there had been her flirtation with Kashyk, the Devore Inspector, but that had been only a ruse in the line of duty, which she had explained to Chakotay at the time.

And things hadn’t gone nearly as far with Kashyk as they had with- _‘what was that stupid hologram’s name anyway?’_ Kathryn wondered.

The bad memories were already beginning to fade.

She sighed in frustration, still searching for the right words to say.

“Good evening Chakotay, I’m sorry I slept with a hologram, I was temporarily insane” she muttered to herself in jest.

But once she had entered Chakotay’s quarters, no words were necessary.

He spoke first.

“Been to sickbay?” he asked, with a gentle smile.

“Yes. You?”

“Earlier.”

They both fell silent for a moment, then ended up speaking at the same time.

“Did the Doctor-“

“I’m sure the Doctor-“

They both chuckled, then Chakotay spoke again.

“Yes, the Doctor told me what happened.”

“You weren’t as affected as some of us. If I hadn’t gone on that stupid holodeck-“ Kathryn broke off, batting her brow with her palm.

“Kathryn, you can hardly blame yourself. Or even the holodeck. It was something completely out of your- or anyone’s- control.”

“Maybe so.”

She stepped closer, their faces almost touching.

“But I am sorry, Chakotay,” she whispered.

Chakotay gently took her face in his hands.

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for.”

“Oh, yes I do. But thanks just the same”, Kathryn murmured, tears brimming in her eyes.

Their faces slowly drew closer, and with one gentle kiss, everything was forgiven and forgotten.

Breaking apart, they both smiled, and Chakotay remarked teasingly:

“But it’s a good thing I’m not the jealous type.”

“And what would you have done if you were?” Kathryn teased back with a smirk.

“Oh, challenged him to a duel?”

They both laughed heartily over the idea.

  
Once they had recovered, they pulled each other close for one more quick kiss, then headed back to the bridge, together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I am aware that there was a return to Fair Haven in the episode ‘Spirit Folk’, but I refuse to watch it, so my one diversion from canon will be to pretend that episode doesn’t exist😂.


	7. He Tells...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this update took a while!
> 
> Anyway, I thought it was about time we got some input from the crew on their relationship...

(Timeline: Sometime in mid season 6)

* * *

“No disrespect intended Commander, but it’s 0200 hours. What is so important?” B’Elanna Torres asked with a slight yawn.

Just after she had finished her duty shift, Chakotay had ushered her to a corner table in the nearly empty mess hall, saying that he had something important to tell her.

“Please, just sit down.”

B’Elanna sighed and obliged him.

She could tell something was wrong.

Chakotay hesitated for a moment, then asked his question.

“You and I have been good friends for a long time, right?”

“Right.”

“And we’ve at times even confided in one another, right?”

“Right...what’s this all about Chakotay?” B’Elanna asked impatiently, looking confused.

Chakotay rose from the table and began to pace.

“It’s not something that’s very easy to say.”

“Try me.”

When Chakotay still didn’t speak, a worried expression crossed B’Elanna’s face.

“Wait... you’re not... demoting me or anything are you?”

Chakotay chuckled softly.

“No, nothing like that.”

“Whew, you had me worried for a second.”

Chakotay glanced briefly around before speaking again.

“It might not be wise, but I feel like if I don’t tell someone I’ll go crazy. And I know I can trust you to keep this confidential.”

B’Elanna smirked as it dawned on her.

“Oh, that.”

Now it was Chakotay’s turn to look confused.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re sleeping with the Captain”, B’ Elanna said simply.

Chakotay looked like he’d been hit by a phaser on full force.

Seeing his expression, B’Elanna hurriedly added “Sorry. I didn’t mean to be so... blunt. But- permission to speak freely?”

“Granted”, Chakotay managed to say, as he slowly sat down, still looking stunned.

B’ Elanna leaned closer.

“Everyone knows that already.”

_“Everyone?”_

“Well, that might be a slight exaggeration, but you know there’s really no secrets on this ship. I mean, look at me and Tom. We managed to stay a secret for what, a week?” B’ Elanna recalled with a smile.

Chakotay relaxed a bit now, and grinned slightly.

“I guess I just didn’t realize. Well, as long as it’s out in the open, how does the crew feel about our relationship? If it’s not betraying any confidences to say.”

“Not at all. We’re all for it. In case you haven’t noticed, nearly everyone on the ship is paired off anyway, why not the two of you? It doesn’t have any bearing on the respect we have for either of you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Well, that’s good to hear. Thank you B’Elanna.”

“What are friends for? Now, if that’s it, I’d really like to get some sleep. I have the early shift.”

“Of course. One more thing-“

“We never had this conversation?” B’Elanna interrupted.

“Exactly,” Chakotay smiled.

B’ Elanna winked and headed out of the mess hall. Chakotay felt much better after their conversation.

He had never truly liked hiding the relationship from the crew, and felt strangely relieved that it was already known among them.

Now if only he could convince Kathryn to feel the same way...


	8. THIS IS NOT AN UPDATE (Sorry!)

After a lot of thought, I’ve made the decision not to continue this fic. It was the first one that I published, and I feel that Istarted off a bit too ambitious-a multichapter without a clear plan of where it was going. 

I’ve found that one-shots are much more to my strength, and I think my writing style has also changed quite a bit since this was done.

And so I am leaving it here.

Sincere apologies to anyone who was hoping for an ending to this.

I hope you’ll still check out my other fics! 

And if anyone wants to take this idea and run with it feel free to do that-I wouldn’t mind at all if someone continued this from their own perspective (with proper credit given of course).

Thanks for reading  ♥️


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